FTW Racing - Fabricated To Win
 
  Home arrow Humour arrow Age arrow No Nursing Home For Me! Friday, 30 July 2010 
Main Menu
Home
ZC Fairlane
XY Falcon Utility Coupe
News Feeds
Humour
Automotive
Quotes
Sailing
Computers
Recipes
Picture Gallery
Contact Us
Games
Song Lyrics
- - - - - - -
NQPFC Forum Latest
Login Form





Lost Password?
No account yet? Register
Most Read
* All The News
* Shelby Drop Front Suspension Mod.
* Ford Crossflow 250 Performance Mods
* Ford Crossflow Inline 6 Tech Info
* 1965 Shelby GT350 Mustang
* How Fast is Fast - Top Fuel Dragster
* Picture Gallery
* Engine falls off a 33 year old Boeing 747 Jumbo Jet
* X-Series Falcon Steering Upgrade
* Advance Australia Fair
* Anniversary Gift Ideas
* DIY LPG Installation
* Ultimate Desktop Picture - Wallpaper
* The Snake and the Kangaroo
* Edel 35 Manufacturer Brochure Extracts
* From air traffic control
* Falcon Speedo Gears
* Fire Risk - Plug-in Air Fresheners
* 50 Great Motorsport Quotes
* Ford Six Fuel Return Lines
* Bathurst Pole Positions
* Nudist Colony
* Ford 4.0 vs 4.1 I6 Engines
* 1964 Thunderbolt Fairlane
* Dictionary of Australian Slang
* Sailing a Catamaran
* Have Your Mammies Grammed
* How Rare is my Australian Ford?
* Bill Gates' Address to Whitney High School in Vasalia, CA
* A Sailor's Dictionary.
Newsfeeds for your site
Advertisement
No Nursing Home For Me! Print E-mail
About two years ago my wife and I were on a cruise through the western Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner.
At dinner we noticed an elderly lady sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in the main dining room.
I noticed that all the staff, ship officers, waiters, busboys, etc. all seemed very familiar with this lady.
I asked our waiter who the lady was, expecting to be told she owned the line, but he said he only knew that she had been on board for the last four cruises, back to back.
As we left the dining room one evening, I caught her eye and stopped to say hello.
We chatted and I said, "I understand you've been on this ship for the last four cruises."
She replied, "Yes, that's true."
I stated, "I don't understand"
and she replied without a pause, "It's cheaper than a nursing home."

So, there will be no nursing home in my future.
When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess cruise ship.
The average cost for a nursing home is $200 a day.
I have checked on reservations at Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior discount price of $135 per day.

That leaves $65 a day for:
  1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.

  2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the restaurant or I can have room service (which means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the week.)

  3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free washers and dryers and shows every night.

  4. They have free toothpaste, razors, soap and shampoo.

  5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient.
    An extra $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.

  6. I will get to meet new people every 7 to 14 days.

  7. TV broken? Light bulb need changing?
    Need to have the mattress replaced?
    No problem!
    They will fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience.

  8. Clean sheets and towels every day and you don't even have to ask for them.

  9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip, you are on Medicare.
    If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship, they will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.
Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia or name where you want to go?
Princess will have a ship ready to go.
So don't look for me in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.

PS And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at no charge!


 
< Prev   Next >

You might be a racer if:
When someone asks where you went to school, you reply, "Skip Barber".
Latest Content
* Ford Crossflow 6 Cylinder Camshaft Suggestions
* Ford 6 Cylinder Engines - Crossflow and OHC
* Roll Center, Center of Gravity & Weight Transfer
* OZZYISMS
* Wheel Fitment - PCD List
* Australian Slang
* Ford Crossflow 6 Rebuild Suggestions
* Ford Alloy Head Crossflow 6 Cylinder Intake & Exhaust Mods
* Ford Crossflow 6 Alloy Head Information
* Chopper
* Tax Explained in Beer
* The Rules of Rural QLD
* Dick Johnson In-Car Commentary
* Nautical Origins of Common Expressions
* Hillbilly Divorce
* Irish Extreme Sports
* SNOTTY RECEPTIONIST
* Feelings of Inadequacy?
* Tips For The Ladies
* Sentence Structure
* We've always done it like that
* Telephone Repair
* Naval Logistics
* Hillbilly Mirror
* Breast Milk
* Bar Tricks
* Ventriloquist Visits NZ
* How Women Think...
* Great Barnyard
* Irish Farmer
: Home :: ZC Fairlane :: XY Falcon Utility Coupe :: News Feeds :: Humour :: Automotive :: Quotes :: Sailing :: Computers :: Recipes :: Picture Gallery :: Contact Us :: Games :: Song Lyrics :: NQPFC Forum Latest :

NQ Websites: Website Design and Hosting, North Queensland