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Who lit the fuse on your tampon?

Support Cannibalism - EAT ME!

God is my co-pilot, but the Devil is my bombardier.

I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.

I wasn't born a mother-in-law. Men like you made me this way.

Keep honking while I reload.

Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

5 days a week my body is a temple. The other 2, an amusement park.

EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the other planets later.

Your child may be an honor student but you're still an idiot.

Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.

Whitewater is over when the First Lady sings.

Jack Kevorkian for White House physician.

Just say NO! to sex with pro-lifers.

My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her... or something like that.

Sure you can trust the government! Just ask an Indian!

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.

If we are what we eat; I'm cheap, fast, and easy.

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!

Horn Broke....Watch for finger!

Armed pitbull with aids on board.

I'm not deaf, I'm ignoring you.

Will race for food

My other toy has tits

The older i get the faster i was

Don't laugh,it could be your daughter inside

No fat chicks

Accidents don't happen, dickheads cause em

Driver carries only $20 worth of ammunition

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

The gene pool could use a little chlorine!

To all the virgins in the world, thanks for nothing.

Backoff I'm a postal worker.

Of course you're faster, but I'm driving in front of you.

If you can read this, I can slam on my brakes and sue you!

I love animals, they're delicious!

I'm pro choice: I choose to hunt, trap, eat meat, and wear fur.

Lost your cat? Try looking under my tires.

Not all men are fools, some are bachelors.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk!

Welfare should be as hard to get as a building permit.

Guns donīt kill people. I do!

Driver carries no cash - heīs maried.

Donīt steal! The Government doesnīt like any competition.

My D-grade son nails your A-grade daughter

My dog is smarter than your honor student.

The more hair I lose, the more head I get.

Yo cambia mi dos llantas nuevas por tu vieja.

Good girls go to heaven, Bad girls go everywhere.

Work hard, millions of welfare recipients are counting on you.
 
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You might be a racer if:
When you hear 'overcooked it', instead of food you think 'off the track'.
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